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 Tuesday, June 26, 2001

 

 Dear Family and Friends, 

This is something you might like to read when you have a little while.  I wanted to tell you about my adventures on the road this month but it turns out I had more to relate than I realized when I began.  This runs on to five pages.  So please forgive my long-windedness.    I will put links here in case you want to jump to only certain parts:

1 EPCOT

2 PARASAILING

3 GO-KARTS

4 SHOOTING STARS

5 BORDER TOWN

6 THE BIG WAVE

7 EPICUREANISM

8 GLIDING

9 INDIAN CULTURE SHOCK

10 LARA CROFT

Thanks to a software training assignment, I spent the last two weeks training -- one week in Orlando, one in Scottsdale.  Naturally I wasn't going to get to these places and fail to have some fun on the side.  

EPCOT:

I went to Orlando early so I could go to Epcot Center (my second visit).  I found the souvenirs interesting and had to restrain myself from buying some African wood chimes, Japanese comic books and French perfumes.  But I did buy a unicorn pińata, which we used in our training class, and some Mozart Kugeln, a hazelnut candy from Austria that has always been a favorite. 

There was a very pretty belly dancer in the Moroccan restaurant, who seemed to wear a huge smile of genuine enjoyment as she cha-ching cha-chinged away on the finger cymbals.  I passed a very pleasant hour in the restaurant, sipping their strong coffee.  Naturally some fat tourist guys in the audience had to get in on the belly dancing act, too, which was indeed amusing.  Maybe our rhythmic starlet knew that they were bound to bounce in on the act and had been smiling in anticipation. 

PARASAILING:

Midweek of week one, I finally made good on a long-held ambition: going  parasailing.  Not far away was a lake with parasailing and airboat rides.  It doesn’t look scary, and people tell you it won't be, but I still had trepidations whilst I was being strapped to the parachute.  You start by sitting on the long back deck of the power boat.  The boat pulls forward till the parachute fills, then accelerates a little till your behind starts to come up off the deck.  I shouted, "What can you hold ON to?" The driver said, "The parachute straps that are flat on your chest!" And up I went, being cinched out little by little. 

After my bottom was off the boat, the fear went away.  Once you're airborne, you're basically airborne, no matter how high.  The boat got smaller and smaller, quieter and quieter.  The boat would turn left or right and the chute wouldn't respond till about 20 seconds later.   

Eventually, you couldn't even hear the boat.  It was a ton of fun, with the wind blowing by you, that balmy Florida air.  They let me out to 800 feet and there I stayed, for a quarter of an hour.  

About the time I was to come down, I noticed some dark clouds that had started to creep in at the other end of the lake.  And I heard thunder.  I gave the boat guys the thumbs down to reel me in and thought, "Well, I'm sure these clouds probably just have some internal lightning - - -" CRACCKK!  A big bolt shot down to the water from one of the dark clouds. 

At this point, my thumbs down signal was being done with BOTH hands (and probably feet, too!) and very insistently! A witness might have said that I yelled a few naughty things, too.    I thought, "Unless there is some huge object I am not seeing, it seems to me that I am the highest thing out on this lake!"

The guys were cinching me in so fast that the parachute got higher.  "In fact," I thought, "I may be the highest thing around for MILES! .  .  .  Is that a tingling sensation I am feeling in my arms? Is my hair starting to stand up? You know, I don't get a warning if lightning is going to hit me.  Nature is not a theme park attraction." 

Such were my cheery thoughts as I finally clunked down onto the boat deck, shaking worse than before the ride.  The guys maxed out the turbo speed in getting us back to shore and about as soon as we tied up, a big thunderstorm came in.  

All in all, it wasn't a bad beginning to my air, water and speed adventures.   More were to follow later.  

GO-KARTS:

The next night, another staffer on the training project seemed to catch my fever for fun as I walked him through a handful of the choice tourist pamphlets.  We accordingly bopped off in a rental car to a go-kart track, a deluxe multiple-figure-eight roadway. 

The track ran on about 4 vertical levels and was pretty involved.  Soon I was reliving my glory days as a 12-year-old, whipping around the deserted malls and church parking lots of Lima, Ohio.  In this speedster incarnation, however, I found I was saying different things to myself than in the old days.  Instead of "Go! Go! Floor it!" I was saying things like "Now, you're not out here to prove anything, you're just out to have some fun."  Such are the changes time brings .  .  .   

I made sure I trailed the whole pack of dragsters and my only fear was that they would lap me and get me into their mix-up.  The big black flag that was thrown to get me off the road after lap 4 seemed to come at about the right moment.  

CELESTIAL DISPLAYS:

At week end, I flew to Arizona and met my friends, Tom and Diane Perski, who took me to Tucson.  The sweet smell of the cactus blossoms is such a delightful backdrop out there. 

We got in at around midnight and while talking in the driveway I suddenly saw a meteor fall in the sky in back of Tom.  Turns out shooting stars are a nightly spectacle in Tucson.   So we went out to the back porch to watch them. 

About every few minutes, one would streak across the sky (about 1/5 of the sky's width), or seem to fall.  The stars seemed very close, and the Milky Way a paved celestial road indeed.   

At about 2 AM, we saw what looked like a headlight coming over the top of a nearby mountain.  We didn't pay it any attention until suddenly -- POP! -- the moon rose, but all at once, as though it had just shot up from a jack-in-the-box.   You might think it is time for me to start just saying no to hard drugs.  But I'm sure Tom would vouch for the lunar phenomenon.  

MEXICAN BORDER TOWN:

The next day we went to the Mexican border town of Nogales to shop at the curio stores.  I am becoming a big fan of the Arizona climate.  It's hot, but so dry that it is not uncomfortable, and it feels good to be in the sun.  The car thermometer showed a temperature of 111 degrees but it was not unbearable.   

The merchants' various ploys to get you to come into their shops were amusing, from "I got the best low-priced junk out here" to "If I don't got what you want I steal it for you!" 

THE BIG WAVE:

Back in Phoenix, the second work week began.  But after a few days, it was again time for some fun.  The training team had been put up at the very snazzy Scottsdale Plaza resort, a luxury 40-acre complex.  But its swimming pools with dockside cabanas and waterfalls to create an extra cooling effect began to bore me.   As they so frequently do!  :-)))

 So I headed off to Tempe (they say "tem-PEE") to BIG SURF Water Park.  It had 18 slides but of course I would hardly be the type to ride every one, right?

The climactic experience for me was the Wave Machine, which released a three-to-four-foot wave every 3 minutes or so.  I liked this because confronting it was a chance to gain some inner mastery (so important for the hyperactive youngster).   

At first, this wave would charge out and all the kids would scream and we would all just run away from it.  Suddenly I realized that we were all running but the wave wasn't even hitting us till about 10 seconds later.  So I started playing a game of looking this monster full in the face every time it was released and counting the seconds of its approach.  I figured this would be useful to me later in tornado watching with professional storm chasers. 

Eventually, I wasn't feeling a THING when the monster was uncaged.   I had demystified the dragon.  I had conquered my demons.  At that moment a kid conked into my head with his head.  This was nature's little way of giving me something new to think about.   

EPICUREAN SURROUNDINGS:

Back at the resort, I decided to find an interesting supper.  Everyone had been raving about a Ruth's Chris Steak House that I tried and it was -- you know -- just a steakhouse with the nowadays-requisite "500-degree" serving plate (their claim, not mine) where your (rather small) steak sizzles in special butter. 

This night I was allured by other emanations than any of bovine origin.   As I walked about in an area of shops, I was attracted by the (for me) unusual sight of "misters" that were creating a gauze of coolness over a gazebo with sweet little Italian lights.  You've probably seem these, but these misters are a web of pipes that traverse an area's ceiling and edges, and these emit a fine, refreshing spritz. 

This restaurant, “Pacific Rim”, served food so well-prepared and flavorful that it was an experience beyond dining.  It was an esthetic transfiguration.  I swooned over a combined dish of lamb with plum sauce and tuna with ginger and wassabi.  Everything blended perfectly.   For the first time ever, I wrote the chef a note of compliments and, of course, my waiter was tipped particularly well.  

SKY SOARING:  gliding on plumes of desert air:

Let me not belabor my discoveries further except for two more: sky soaring, and the Indian Museum.  

In the outskirts of Phoenix, I took a glider ride -- with a pilot, of course.   However, I was put in the front of the two seats and was told I would be doing the flying.  "Never!" I thought.  After me, the pilot got in and pulled over us a fiberglass windshield (you never felt any wind while aloft). 

We were tethered to a small plane that dragged us across a gravel runway till we eased up into the air.  The gravel squeaked so loud and long through the flimsy glider's body that I wondered when we would make it off the ground.   

Up we went to 3.000 feet.  Honestly, I couldn't look at anything for a while.  Job One was to hold my composure and not get airsick like I never have been but like the guy kept talking about my possibly being, especially in steep turns.  The glider would go over the wavy air and swoop from side to side and I would look down at the instruments and think "Soon I will have the nerve to look around.  But not now.  There's no rush". 

Presently (I might as well pick up some other resemblances to Charles Dickens besides being long-winded) .  .  .  presently, I say, I gradually looked out at the desert below, the mountains, the airport, the plane that was towing us.   I kept trying to get slow deep breaths but they were awhile in being easy.  I looked at the wing tips and gradually began to assume some confidence in the strength of those light wings.  

Then the pilot said, "OK.  Break us free." (GULP!) "Pull that knob in front of you.  You will hear a snap when the cable disengages." "Uh.  .  .  .  do I pull it hard or gradually?" "It doesn't matter.  Just pull."  

When I had done such a “breakaway-pull” on the Dare Devil Dive ride at Great America a few years ago, I immediately thereafter experienced the greatest terror I have ever felt in my life.  I was pretty sure this wouldn’t be as bad, but I didn't know.  So I pulled.  But I couldn't look.  

Despite what I had been told in advance, I believed we would go into a dive from that instant.  But the nose didn't even dip as it does on a released hang glider.   Instead, we started lifting even more, and even got above the tow plane.  I looked at the meter that shows rate of rise or sink and we were going up at 200 feet a minute.   This was good because I had been told that when the glider flies in still air it descends at 100 feet a minute.  So we had some kind of good ratio going there.  

I had asked the pilot before the flight when it got really fun in the sky.   He said "when a thermal takes you up at about 900 feet a minute." As I watched, the vertical speed meter went to 300 .  .  .  400 .  .  .  600 .  .  .  and got over 900 feet a minute.  And it was indeed fun!  

Well, you know what they say about things that go up.  Soon we hit the edge of the thermal and began clocking on the downward side.  In about fifteen seconds we were falling .  .  .  excuse me – “descending” .  .  .  at 600 feet a minute.   But we were so far up in the sky it didn't matter.  Yeah, you could get bumped pretty hard on terra firma at that rate, but we were far from earth.   

We would find thermals, ride them up, then come off them and ride down the sinks.  We got up to 6000 feet, 3000 above the altitude where we had been released.   When the pilot finally  told me to take over the flying, I didn't mind.  It was easy.  Go down and get lift, pull back and up until you start to stall.  Bank to the side with pedals and stick.  Pull back out.   You want me to give you a ride sometime?   (As if!) 

Finally it was time to come in.  The pilot took over and as we approached the airfield I noticed we were descending at the old familiar 600 feet a minute.   I won't tell you I didn't get nervous and wonder whether or not the pilot was also, but obviously we made in down fine.  

Then they asked me if I wanted to go on the acrobatic flight, with barrel rolls and front loops.  I politely declined.  Don't know if that one's even going to make it onto my wish list.

MUSEUM OF CULTURE SHOCK

   The last adventure to relate was a real surprise.  I went to the Heard Museum of Indian Culture in Phoenix. 

There was a gallery of pictures by Barry Goldwater and some pottery donated by Sandra Day O'Connor.  There was a great section that had recordings by people from each major tribe of the Southwest.   Kind of what I expected.

Then came a shock.  Upstairs I came upon a gallery that was about "The Indian Boarding School Experience."  The only museum episode I've ever had that could compare in shock value would be the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam or the death camp at Dachau. 

For the free Indians, re-enculturation at faraway boarding schools was the murdering of their whole way of life and, in touring these exhibits, you imagined you could feel some of the trauma that they went through.  

You started in an area with murals of the prairie and grasslands, where you felt the Indians' freedom.  Then you heard the trains and saw the engines that took the children away. 

There were many spoken recordings of how hard the parents and grandparents cried when the children were confiscated and removed.  The children would be gone for years at a time and some of the kids died in school and never returned.  Their graves showed their tribes of origin.  

After the train area, you saw the school barber's chair, with the kids' beautiful long hair on the ground all around it.  This was an appalling sight.  You knew that this was the moment, the guillotine moment, when their dignity, pride and prior identity as free people was stripped away in mere moments. 

Next came an office where you would choose you new white name.  Both first and last.  Then came the classrooms and dorm rooms. 

Suddenly you realized that the school had you enveloped in the middle of their Total Environment.  It felt like a completely  foreign and sinister encapsulation, especially in contrast to life in the forests and grasslands.  

If you used any Indian words or alluded to any Indian ways, you were punished.  The recordings of the Indians describing life there were so real and moving.    Of course, most acclimated to the new ways, especially being young, but these were conquered people, living under conquest, and their progress under the system had a bittersweet cast.

There were posters to recruit you for activities.  These were so extreme that they seemed a plant by some political activist group to enrage you against the schools.  On the boys' poster, it said "Learn to be tough and not show your emotions.  Learn to take direction from a stern, father-like coach."  Literally, these were the words. 

This school system, incidentally, was organized under the Department of War and was run by the military.  On the girls' activities list, it said, "Learn to be clean and civilized."  

The pictures of the boys, heads shaven, in military uniforms, was such a disconnect.  Their bodies and faces were completely Native Indian! And they were dressed in Army-like uniforms.  It looked like the ultimate vanquishment.  One only hopes they were never sent to kill their own.  But somehow I would not feel surprised if they were.  

I found myself asking as I thought about the conquest of North America, "How could it have played out any other way? Was there some middle ground possible? Where was any example of it in the world?"  I had no affirmative answers.

Of course, there were Indians touring this museum, too.  I met them in a room where there were copies of some of their high school yearbooks, "The Sandwriter". 

The book was in the same style as all high school yearbooks.  These books were from 1986-88.   I noticed that they did mention the tribe of each student, with the name.   But there were no Indian names.  Only, "Tom Wilson" and "Susan White."  It was an eerie sight.

I bought a Native Indian newspaper in the bookstore and noticed so many writers and letters to the editor written by people with no trace of tribal roots in their names.  But they were all Indians.  Some would be "Bob Black Elk" or "Joan High Mountain" but most weren't.  Just "Jack Jones" and "Mary Smith." 

And so my adventures on the road ended not with thrills but chills. 

LARA CROFT:

Upon getting back to Chicago, I again put my activities on the high-adrenalin road by seeing "Lara Croft: Tomb Raider" which I highly recommend if you like action movies set in majestic and exotic locales.  

I hope you have enjoyed my stories.  Remember that I like to hear yours, too. 

 --Robb Murray

 

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